Detangling 04: Tammy Woods
Tammy’s story turned a lot of our worlds upside down when she first came forward with her story of abuse at the hands of Mike Bickle in early 2024. Her bravery was inspiring as I read her story for the first time, even though her story broke my heart. I think this interview is honestly amazing. She is very articulate and sheds a lot of light on the manipulation that Bickle employed, while maintaining an open heart to the Lord and the process of healing.
Q: You shared your story with the world earlier this year, how has it been coming to terms with your abuse since then?
Coming to terms with clergy sexual abuse has been a journey of the heart for sure. Having never once framed myself as a victim of Mike, I had to initially just sit in the shock and horror of it all. At first, it was as if an internal detonator went off in my soul and everything went into slow motion. The stone-cold truth that I was a victim and a survivor of clergy sexual abuse crushed and crushes my soul. There have obviously been many feelings in coming to terms with this new life frame. Once the shock waves subsided, grief presented itself in all of its forms. Sometimes crashing over me like a tsunami of rage and sometimes rolling over me like a gentle tide of numbness or fatigue; often unexpectedly.
Facing and accepting this general new frame of clergy sexual abuse as a minor has not been the only truth with which I’ve had to come to terms. This last year has set me on a course of having to reframe 43 years of perceived friendship, camaraderie, trust, and redemption as it pertains specifically to Mike. I confess that this has been an anguishing reality. I am revisiting over four decades of encounters, conversations, experiences, and conclusions with Mike personally, but also those interactions that include the people I love most and the ministry passions of my heart. I am in the process of tediously applying new frames of abuse, deception, and manipulation to each context. It is both exhausting and liberating.