Let’s Talk about The Awakening

I think it’s time to start talking about The Awakening.

For those that are unfamiliar, The Awakening was a series of revival-type meetings that happened at IHOPKC from November 2009-October 2010-ish. One day during a chapel service at IHOPU (International House of Prayer University) there was an outpouring of the Holy Spirit. A lot of people were deeply touched.

If you’re triggered by the word “outpouring”, sorry. Wasn’t sure what other word to use.

This turned into nightly meetings that went on for several months. The meetings happened 6 nights a week from 6pm-12am (if my memory serves correctly). The meetings consisted of worship, prayer, sometimes teaching, and tons of testimonies.

They would regularly pray for certain groups of people depending on what they felt the Lord was emphasizing. Such as those needing healing from certain diseases or sicknesses.

When I showed up to the first meeting, I was pretty ticked off.

My mom had picked me up from school. I was about 10 years old. I was really excited because I had a play date scheduled with a friend for that afternoon.

But my mom picked me up and said it was canceled because there was some meeting where the Holy Spirit was moving and everyone was going to check it out. I was disappointed that my play date was canceled.

But shortly after arriving, I wasn’t disappointed anymore. I loved it. And my play date ended up being there too. So win-win.

We went almost every night for months. I loved going to the front and dancing to “Lowest Place” and “No One Else” with my friends. If you know, you know.

The Awakening is very much a mixed bag. Ask anyone who was around at the time.

But, from my perspective as a 10-year-old at the time, I loved it. For the most part.

Being a kid, I didn’t know everything that was going on in the background, and there was a lot going on behind the scenes. Ignorance is bliss I guess.

All my friends were there, all my favorite worship leaders would lead, and I saw people get saved, delivered, and healed. I truly believe that the Lord did in fact move during The Awakening.

They decided to name it The Awakening and not a revival, because well, it wasn’t a revival. It was, as they called it, a refreshing. “We were just ankle-deep in the activity of the Holy Spirit”. But we waited and asked for more.

Several positive memories stand out from that season. There was a night where Justin Rizzo’s team was leading. Jon Rizzo began singing a spontaneous song about the joy of the Lord and the marriage supper of the Lamb. I cannot fully describe the supernatural joy that was in that room at the moment. It was powerful. I’ve never experienced anything like it before or since.

People were really healed. Dozens were delivered from eating disorders, self-hatred, and many other things.

But it was not all rainbows and butterflies.

Like anything that is led by people (meaning everything), it got messy.

For the most part, it felt exciting, but I remember a few things that weren’t great.

Testimonies were heavily emphasized during The Awakening. I believe in the sharing of testimonies, it stirs up faith.

But some of the testimonies that were shared should not have been shared in a room full of children or publicly at all. Repeatedly, girls would go up and share their stories of being delivered from self-hatred after being raped or experiencing sexual assault. That should never have happened in a room with children. Also, those poor women should never have been hauled onto a stage to share such vulnerable and tender experiences to a room filled with a couple thousand people.

I believe in deliverance. I truly believe that there are times when the Lord suddenly breaks in and delivers people from self-hatred, eating disorders, and addictions. I believe in it. I pray for it.

It was, however, inappropriate to share those things from a stage. In front of thousands (and even more, watching online and on GodTV).

I specifically remember one young lady who was pulled on stage to share her testimony of deliverance from self-hatred after a sexual assault experience over and over and over again. She was the poster child. It was wrong. I am not sure if she is still walking with the Lord now.

I can’t imagine how traumatizing that would have been to share your experience of sexual assault on a stage several times. So unnecessary. My heart goes out to her.

You can stir up faith in the room without exposing the vulnerable. You can do it without using a poor girl as a poster child or sharing unnecessary details.

After one night at The Awakening, I came home and said “Mommy what is rake?” I misheard the word “rape” as “rake”.

I was 10 years old. I didn’t need to know about rape. None of the kids in that room did.

I learned a lot in that season. I was exposed to things that I wasn’t ready for. I didn’t need to hear about self-harm, eating disorders, sexual assault, or people wishing they were a different gender. It was incredibly unhelpful for a 10-year-old girl.

This was something that I know I was not alone in thinking. I’m sure several parents were not impressed with the lack of filtering that took place at The Awakening. My mom sent several emails and talked to several leaders. Some agreed with her take, but nothing ever changed.

Other things might cause someone to tilt their head at The Awakening. But nothing that was necessarily abnormal for a charismatic ministry experiencing the Holy Spirit in a more significant way. People faking their manifestations, people riding high on their selfish ambition, psycho-attention seekers. Unfortunate, but not unheard of.

I did personally encounter the Holy Spirit there. I remember being at the front receiving prayer from a leader at IHOP. I felt the Holy Spirit on me, but also felt the pressure to outwardly demonstrate it, cause you know everyone else was manifesting in the spirit and falling out and all that. But the leader whispered so gently in my ear “You don’t have to fall back on the floor.”

That phrase was so helpful for me. God can touch me on the inside without me ever showing an external sign of it. I don’t have to feel pressure and fall down or start crying or singing if it’s not natural or what I feel the Lord is doing.

It was not uncommon for someone to “encourage you to fall” as they prayed for you, i.e. push you over. So when that leader said that to me, it helped ground me a little bit to pay more attention to the Holy Spirit in me and not what was going on around me.

I got to really practice praying for people. I loved praying for sick people, and I still do. And let me tell you, I can navigate a mosh pit without getting sloshed around better than most. If you dropped me off at some rave, I’d be fine.

The worship leader roster at IHOPKC at the time was at its peak. The best of the best were at IHOP at the time. Misty Edwards, Laura Hackett Park, Cory Asbury, Jaye Thomas, Matt Gilman, and many others. Worshiping with them was a huge highlight.

There were many profound songs that came out of that time. So many so that they made an album from The Awakening.

I can also assure you that every IHOP kid can still sing every word to those songs today. Laura Hackett Park’s rendition of Joyful, Joyful is still my favorite of all time (after the Sister Act version obviously).

You can’t argue that IHOP’s music game wasn’t insane. No matter the outcome or the darkness at IHOP, God breathed on singers and musicians. Dozens of beautiful, grounded, deep songs came out of IHOP. Some that I dearly love and have gotten me through a lot of tough seasons.

One night, Misty Edwards was just singing and playing on the piano during a quiet time during the evening. She started singing a simple phrase.

“I knew what I was getting into.”

She began to sing this spontaneous moment, and it has stuck with me. And many others. She sang about how God knowing us completely, still chose us. Still loves us.

God loves us even in our weakness. And that is still true.

But considering recent events, that song comes into a new light. And it breaks my heart a little bit.

Still a good song though.

Some of the fruit from The Awakening is questionable, at best. Many of the “poster children” don’t walk with the Lord anymore. One guy who was supposedly healed from being in a wheelchair now claims it was the Placebo effect and is an atheist. I don’t know if it was the Lord or the Placebo effect, but the Lord does. And it breaks my heart that this guy is now an atheist. He claims his deconstruction started at that moment at The Awakening.

So yeah, The Awakening like everything at IHOP, is a pretty mixed bag.

But I will end with this. Ain’t No Party Like a Holy Ghost Party.

Photo by Isaac Smith